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DEAD OR ALIVE? IDENTIFYING ALIEN CORPSES

Written By: Percival Quincebottom Publishing

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DEAD OR ALIVE? WHAT IS IT!!



Now, I can't tell you how many times I've beaten a face-hugging alien trying to implant an embryo in my stomach to "death" with a fire extinguisher, only to have it pounce on my the very next second! It's unnerving, unnatural, and just plain disgusting. So, with this little tidbook, I hope to inform the everyday ready how to tell if these little buggers are really dead or not.

Initial Removal

Now, when you initially rip one of these guys off of your face, it'll stop moving for a bit, it'll hang there for a while. This is your chance to drop it and run, or throw it and hide.

After Dropping

When you drop these guys onto the ground, they'll stay stationary for another while. It is important to observe closely for twitches and eyes glowing, because this may indicate life within the suspect.

DEAD OR ALIVE

If the little guy starts vibrating its tail after about twenty seconds, then it's about to go veral all