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How to Properly Read Books: The Special Editi

Written By: Buck Pavlov

Reference
How to Properly Read Books: The Special Edition
HOW THE LIBRARIAN LEFT HIS ID! HONK vol.1
First, please use a pair of wirecutters to cut out the coupon inside this very book.
(Your book copy must be a true special edition to receive coupon)

This coupon can be used at a number of locations such as:
  • The Kitchen (Free Doughnuts Anyone?)
  • The Bar (Maint or Regular)
  • The HoP's Office (Maint access only)
  • The Cargo Office (Gimmie all the monkey crates you got)

    If you are unable to read the book at any point, please contact your local clown or mime (though the mimes generally a bit quiet) and ask them to read it to you and not steal your coupon.

    Please do not read further without taking out the coupon first, doing so will invalidate your coupon!!

    Now that you have your coupon cut out (you do have it cut out right?), proceed to cargo and use your coupon to get a free pizza crate and foam force crate. Don't eat that pizza just yet! You'll need it for later.

    Once it arrives, bring both crates to the holodeck and set it to the beach setting (Don't let nobody take those crates!).


    All set? Good! Let's proceed to the next step!
    Put on the proper beach attire and defend your pizza at all costs. You can lost some foam force guns but remember they have precious ammo! You can also hire others to help defend the pizza (but remember, when it comes time, it's YOUR pizza)


    Guard the pizza until the shuttle arrives, and departs (Don't you dare leave the station, with or without the pizza(the pizza's name is now Wilson and you've leveled up!)) If you have guards, now is the time for a distraction or perhaps betrayal. Either way you must betray Wilson and consume his flesh.
    ALL OF HIS FLESH

    Have you eaten your only remaining friend? Good! I truly hope this journey was worth it. You climbed a high mountain and pissed off the edge into the glorious gusting winds. Please take this time to reflect on said journey and gain perspective.
    If you have not gained perspective, please contact the manufacturer as something may be wrong with your Special Edition copy! We wouldn't want that!! (And yes you've gained another level. Jeez you're getting greedy at this point)







    With all of this behind you, we hope you have enjoyed your copy of The Liberrian and The Missing ID vol. -3














    Have you discovered the meaning of life yet? Good! You'll need it for the next volume. Make sure it too is the special edition or none of this will have mattered.
     Honk.