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The Books of Bokonon
The First Book
Warning from title page: Don't be a fool! Close this book at once! It is nothing but lies!
Verse 1: All of the true things that I am about to tell you are shameless lies.
Verse 2: In the beginning, God created the earth, and he looked upon it in His cosmic loneliness.
And God said, "Let Us make living creatures out of mud, so the mud can see what We have done."
And God created every living creature that now moveth, and one was man.
Mud as man alone could speak. God leaned close as mud as man sat up, looked around, and spoke.
Man blinked. "What is the purpose of all this?" he asked politely.
"Everything must have a purpose?" asked God.
"Certainly," said man.
"Then I leave it to you to think of one for all this," said God.
And He went away.
Verse 3: Live by the lie that make you brave and kind and healthy and happy.
Verse 4:
On the creation of Bokononism:
I wanted all things
To seem to make some sense,
So we could all be happy, yes,
Instead of tense.
And I made up lies
So that they all fit nice,
And I made this sad world
A par-a-dise.
Verse 5:
On the end of the world:
Someday, someday, this crazy world will have to end,
And our God will take things back that He to us did lend.
And if, on that sad day, you want to scold our God,
Why just go ahead and scold Him. He'll just smile and nod.
Verse 6: Pay no attention to Captain. Captain doesn't have the slightest idea what's really going on.
Verse 7:
A poem on pretending to understand:
Tiger got to hunt,
Bird got to fly;
Man got to sit and wonder, "Why, why, why?"
Tiger got to sleep,
Bird got to land;
Man got to tell himself he understand.
Verse 8:
On the ignorance of learned men:
Beware of the man who works hard to learn something,
Learns it, and finds himself no wiser than before.
He is full of murderous resentment of people who are ignorant without having come by their ignorance the hard way.
Verse 9:
The Final Sentence
If I were a younger man, I would write a history of human stupidity;
And I would climb to the top of Mount McHonk and lie down on my back with my history for a pillow; and I would take from the ground some of the blue-white poison that makes statues of men; and I would make a statue of myself, lying on my back, grinning horribly, and thumbing my nose at You Know Who.
Bokonon
Midget, midget, midget, how he struts and winks,
The Book of Bokonon
Written By: Bokonon
Religion
Warning from title page: Don't be a fool! Close this book at once! It is nothing but lies!
Verse 1: All of the true things that I am about to tell you are shameless lies.
Verse 2: In the beginning, God created the earth, and he looked upon it in His cosmic loneliness.
And God created every living creature that now moveth, and one was man.
Mud as man alone could speak. God leaned close as mud as man sat up, looked around, and spoke.
Man blinked. "What is the purpose of all this?" he asked politely.
"Everything must have a purpose?" asked God.
"Certainly," said man.
"Then I leave it to you to think of one for all this," said God.
And He went away.
Verse 4:
To seem to make some sense,
So we could all be happy, yes,
Instead of tense.
And I made up lies
So that they all fit nice,
And I made this sad world
A par-a-dise.
Someday, someday, this crazy world will have to end,
And our God will take things back that He to us did lend.
And if, on that sad day, you want to scold our God,
Why just go ahead and scold Him. He'll just smile and nod.
Verse 6: Pay no attention to Captain. Captain doesn't have the slightest idea what's really going on.
Verse 7:
Bird got to fly;
Man got to sit and wonder, "Why, why, why?"
Tiger got to sleep,
Bird got to land;
Man got to tell himself he understand.
Beware of the man who works hard to learn something,
Learns it, and finds himself no wiser than before.
He is full of murderous resentment of people who are ignorant without having come by their ignorance the hard way.
Verse 9:
If I were a younger man, I would write a history of human stupidity;
And I would climb to the top of Mount McHonk and lie down on my back with my history for a pillow; and I would take from the ground some of the blue-white poison that makes statues of men; and I would make a statue of myself, lying on my back, grinning horribly, and thumbing my nose at You Know Who.
Bokonon
Midget, midget, midget, how he struts and winks,